Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Someone Shake my world please

All of a sudden I feel distant from the people that matter to me. Not that they are pulling away, but I am. I am doing subconciously. I don't know why I am doing it. I don't want to do it, How can I stop myself? Its like something inside me is dying. Like that rose on Beauty and the Beast, how it just slowly wilts, and the petals fall. Just a slow gradual death. Hmmm... Wonder what that's about?

Maybe its the holidays? My hormones? My grief? My family? My friends? My job? My boyfriend (do I even call him that)? Who am I? Where do I belong?

I want change. Instead of taking my solo 6 month trip this year I went with family to Disneyland. And that was good times. But I missed out on the me time. The time that I take to connect with me. Find myself again. Breathe again.

I need that. I'm feeling so cluttered. My whole life, it's like I just want to shake my world.

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